So, you’re thinking about trying insecurity for the first time. That’s perfectly normal, age appropriate behavior. A lot of kids experiment with insecurity and grow up to be fine, productive, upstanding citizens. But listen: As fun and sexy as insecurity may look, you need to consider the potential downsides before heading over to Hot Topic. Some kids think they can stop at shoegazing and the next thing they know they’re out on the street, trying to score a Misfits t-shirt.
Here are a few warning signs that your insecurity habit has turned into a nervous monkey on your back:
1) You can really relate to Morrissey. I’m just kidding, Morrissey, you’re cool. Please don’t write a song about me.
2) You’re susceptible to advertising. Do you want to spend the rest of your life chasing the latest phone, the nicest watch, the tuckiest eye tuck? Just keep chasing the insecurity dragon and you’re guaranteed a life of wasting time and money on the latest/greatest.
3) Life is a contest. Competition is healthy, turning everything into a contest is not. When every person who passes you on the freeway is a personal affront, when your friends’ victories translate as “you think you’re better than me?” maybe it’s time to check into a 12 step insecurity program.
4) Your relationships are in tatters. Which, of course, feeds your insecurity. Aren’t self-fulfilling prophesies great? It doesn’t matter whether we’re talking about home or office, when everybody else is the problem, you (or more specifically your insecurity monkey) are the real problem.
5) You think that this post is about you. Oh my, is this a red flag. When every essay, comment, story, conversation, and Britney Spears vocal warm-up strikes you as a personal assault, the insecurity monkey has his claws in deeply. Act fast before you become a Faux News pundit.
I’ve been there, little brother, and I can attest that a life of insecurity is no way to live. We each have enough legitimate battles to fight everyday without allowing that insecure voice in our heads to make stuff up. You’re a good person. People like you. You have talent, smarts, and personality-a-plenty. Own it, and speaking of owning it where did you get the Misfits tee? I’d look cool in one of those, right? Right?