You walk into a drab, brown government office and see what looks like Arnold Schwarzenegger seated behind the desk. He wears a leather jacket and sunglasses.
“What’s this? Halloween was last month,” you say.
“I am from the future,” Arnold says.
“Terminator. I get it.”
“No, I am not a Terminator. My scores were too low. I am the Bureaucrator.”
“Is there somebody else I can talk to?” you ask. “I’m just here to see if I can give one of these refugees somewhere to stay until they get on their feet.”
“We have 1,000 refugees,” the Bureaucrator says. “One of them is Sarah Connor. She will save humanity.”
“Yeah, I saw the movie,” you say.
“Another is a homicidal maniac who will surely kill you and your neighbors. There is no way of knowing which is which.”
“What about the other 998?”
“They are not Sarah Connor and not homicidal maniacs. The Bureaucrator is not interested in them.”
“So you’re telling me that I have a 1 in 1,000 shot of saving humanity, but I have the same probability of being chopped up in my sleep?” you ask.
“Yes. You might save 7 billion lives and you might die. Most likely you will just make a friend,” the Bureaucrator says. “Or you can walk away. I have some filing to do.”
You notice the Bureaucrator eyeing the maid and realize that you need to make your choice quickly. Do you take your shot at saving humanity or slowly back out of the room and head over to Starbucks for a tasty beverage? Make your choice and defend it in the comments section below, and come on people, Let’s make Laura B. proud.
Categories: choose and defend
No brainer. Offer my home to a refugee family.
Defense: The odds of them being Sarah Conner or a homicidal maniac are not in my favor – my lottery odds does not live up to that “luck thing” the Irish are supposed to have. Besides, if I get chopped up in my sleep, I will not feel it, I will be asleep (unless he is sloppy). And if I sense the maniac, just because I do not want my neighbors to pay for my sudden lottery ‘luck’ – I have a few machetes of my own hidden around the house, and while I may not have the typical Irish luck, I do have the Irish temper.
But…..most likely I would get a nice mellow family who would be new friends, and I would be very happy with that. No need to seek out the one who will save the world. Isn’t Donald Trump already doing that?
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It seems that none of these refugees have really been through any kind documentation or filter process. The powers that be only know that one is Connor and has admitted allowing at least one homicidal maniac into the country. Since they don’t even care about the rest it is quite possible there are several other homicidal maniacs among them.
I would suggest the Bureaucrator take responsibility of them and place them in the homes of his colleagues. In the meantime I’ll slowly back out of the room and not waste money in a place like Starbucks, but use the cash to buy food and litter for my cats.
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Oooh, a split decision: One for the kitty litter. Come on people, we need a tiebreaker.
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